Choices…

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Well, here’s a post that a little bit of a departure for me. But it’s also important.

All the hoopla – politics. And this blog is not about that. It’s about DIY, sewing, companionship, sharing, finding the joy. But I also know that everything blends in with everything else. We are all multi-dimensional human beings.

So I’ll say this. ‘Whatever’ suits me. One of the greatest freedoms I enjoy is thinking and saying what I please. And demonstrating that how I choose. As long as I do that with due respect for people around me, and for the laws and process that I’ve accepted and cherish, I’m in a good place.

All of that being said, I want to share a decision I’ve made, which is to cancel my affiliation with Pattern Review. After 5 years of participation, I just discovered that discussion on the PR forums cannot include political or religious content. I was taken aback when a discussion thread about Melania Trump’s inaugural gown was deleted by the forum moderator, for being a political topic. Subsequent discussions – that are not being deleted – refer to her as a model, and have been permitted to continue.

Melania Trump is the First Lady of the United States. I cannot fathom the reasoning of discussing her impact on fashion, her choice of American designers, and so on, only in the context of her having been a model. And I find it to be a very distressing and disrespectful treatment of her as an individual and as our First Lady.

I regret every one of the 150 dollars I have spent to be a Friend of Pattern Review. I have deleted all my reviews, and I’ve requested cancellation of every trace of my membership.

And that is the choice I can and have made.

With a lighter heart, I’m back to sewing. Bye for now – Coco

28 thoughts on “Choices…

  1. Well, I’m actually fine with Pattern Review’s decision in this case — don’t want to get into a big thing about it, but I see most of the comments are agreeing with you so just wanted to say this reader differs. I’m an admirer of your sewing and your writing though, and hope we can agree to disagree.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I totally agree with you! My sewing blogs, the few I visit like yours, and my cooking facebook groups need to be my happy place. :)And, I love your hair that way!! Thanks for all you do to update your blog with fun sewing!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Your blog is always a first-read for me — the first thing I open up when I see you have a new post. I will miss you at Pattern Review, as the work shown there is such a help for me. I just thank you for sewing so much and sharing your magnificent results!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I was involved in a pleasant and interesting discussion on reddit of all places (FemaleFashionAdvice) about inauguration fashion. Everyone managed to keep to the actual topic – which was a discussion of the outfits, the designers, and how flattering or unflattering the garments were on the ladies who wore them. It even led to a discussion of where to go in Milan to buy co-ordinating gloves and handbags!

    I think that it’s counterproductive to refuse to acknowledge the complete existence of people or things we dislike. And enjoying an outfit, or wanting to know where to get a pattern to replicate a look, isn’t a political issue.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I admire your forthrightness – and wholeheartedly agree. Your stand transcends Pattern Review – thanks for having the guts to speak out. I am trying to live my life doing same, particularly in light of the many unfair, unbalanced blog posts I’ve read in the past two months.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Coco: you are a classy lady. I’m not on PR, but have read your blog–as well as many other sewists–for many years. Seems like most of the other ladies are monolithic in their left wing politics and are never afraid to broadcast it. I find them tiring. All the best xox

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I”m a little confused. I just googled “Pattern Review and Michelle Obama” and many, many hits came up. I didn’t visit each of the pattern review posting listed, but just the google descriptions showed discussions of MB’s coats, tops, and dresses and potential patterns and adaptations. These postings on PR ranged from 2008-2017. Why were these considered acceptable and ones to do with Melania Trump were unacceptable? Thanks for reminding me why I no longer support PR.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ah, Mary. You took the words out of my mouth. You see, they are unable to respect the office for what it is, nor can they respect opinions which differ from their own. I too, stopped supporting PR a long time ago.
      Coco, very well stated post. Andrea xo

      Liked by 1 person

  8. I totally agree with you. Seeing her referred to as the former model who wore the blue coat dress on Saturday is utterly ridiculous and hypocritical. It’s ok to put up pictures of the First Lady, but you have to cut off her face, just incredible. I do find that one moderator seems to have most of the issues as I’ve watched over the past many years. I support you, Coco, but then I’ve always enjoyed being around women who are not afraid to speak their minds. The right decision and a loss for them.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I totally respect your decision. Our decisions and opinions is what makes us who we are. I have to say I somewhat agree with Charlotte in that I understand why PR has done this. I watched the thread that I believe several are referring to spiral completely out of control to utter ugliness. BUT, then again, I had the capability of and proceeded to get out of the thread once I saw the spiral starting. Everyone had this option, so maybe censorship is not the right answer.
    I guess what I am saying is that Deepika has the right to censor whatever on her site. You have the right to not agree and step away. I personally have gained so much over the years that I have been a PR member. I am most grateful for all the wonderful people, like you, who shared their sewing expertise and set up blogs that I linked to originally through PR.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Please accept my apology, Valerie – I’m just learning WordPress, this was my first post. And something new-to-me happened – Your comments were held as spam! I don’t know why, the only filter I’ve put on comments have to do with language (‘ugly’ words…) I found your comments this morning and immediately approved them. I love that you shared your experience, what happened on PR, everything. Brave woman, and you know how much I admire you. Thank you so much! And I hope other readers find your comments here, now that they’re showing up. Coco

      Like

  10. PR is a sewing site. A pattern review site. I loved the First Lady’s blue cashmere outfit so much that I went on PR saying I thought she looked amazing, thinking we could discuss the outfit and how it might start a fashion trend. I did not realise there had been another thread that had dissolved into political unrest. My thread was shut down pretty much immediately because of perceived, not even actual backlash. Yes I am also the person that started the ‘What happened to free speech’ thread. When you cannot discuss an outfit or mention your First Lady’s name – Melania Trump – something is seriously wrong. The hypocrisy of having a thread where she is nameless and faceless is so absurd it’s breathtaking. It is the hypocrisy of PR’s whole stance that is turning me off PR.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I guess Im in the minority because I do understand why PR has this policy. Talk of Melanias fashion will end up talking about her past ( nude model, not high fashion) or her husband. I personally dont want to see that discussion when reading about patterns. Almost all the sewing sites have the same policy and it applies to all in politics not just the current president. These type of discussions almost always end up ugly and many more people end up withdrawing from their memberships because of it.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Hi Coco. I agree with your decision. Thank you for sharing. I have looked at Pattern Review for sometime now wondering if I should join or not. Then there was a class I wanted so just the other day I signed up for six months to give it a try and to do the class. So I’m glad you said something as I’ll be on the lookout for the things you refer to. I appreciate your bringing this to our attention. I’m thinking six months will do it for me anyway. Always enjoy reading/seeing your blog.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I see it as complete hypocrisy for PR to allow a ‘nameless’ thread about Mrs Trumps inauguration outfit. I suspect they did it because the topic just wouldn’t go away. I am also in the process of severing all ties with PR but for now I will leave my reviews alone. I am grateful that you have spoken out.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Good on you for taking a stand. Im not in US but am heartily sick and tired of protests media scrummaging and negative comments. There was a democratic election and Trump won. We owe him the same respect as any other Western leader regardless of individual political leanings. we need more people like you in the world.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. I thought it was a strange policy. But it seems some people on PR can’t discuss fashion without making political comments. Your new President is a very polarising person and I suppose the owner of the site didn’t want the forums to be full of people sniping at each other. That being said, though, I don’t understand how the “model” posts are OK if the “First Lady” ones aren’t. And I’m sure over the years I have seen lots of posts discussing garments worn by the previous First Lady.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. I haven’t been on PR for quite some time. I knew of the hands off politics and religion but I am surprised this extended to fashion worn by first ladies. Of course I don’t pay a lot of attention to that either.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for this – I don’t understand we Melania’s wardrobe can’t be discussed without politics intruding. She is our First Lady and deserves our respect

      Liked by 1 person

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